All those who think I am anti-men
I have heard this multiple times in my life and I write this today out of frustration and to put an end to this constant battering.
Guess what? I am not anti-men! I am anti-patriarchy, I am anti-sexism, I am anti the societal norms which defines the role of the individual based on their sex. I am anti the infinite customs which treat females as subordinate to males. I fail to find a logic behind this utterly irrational discrimination.
I am anti the multiple practices which make daughters a burden on the society, the practice of dowry, the practice of the daughter’s family spending their life’s earning on her marriage which involes the groom too! I am anti the practices where time and again the daughter’s family has to constantly give and even if they take something, they need to ensure to double it and give back. I am anti the people who do not raise their voice against this gross injustice. We aren’t a burden but the societal norms and the inability (or choice) to not speak out makes us a burden.
I am anti the numerous policies which provides for maternity leave and not paternity leave, clearly indicating that it is the job of the mother to nurture the child all through her life. I am anti the system which constantly treats us as somebody’s daughter, wife, mother, daughter-in-law but not an individual. I am anti the system where a girl is always suppose to dress up and look pretty. I may want to wear a pyjama to a party but why do you care? Why can’t you mind your own business? Why do people not understand the meaning of the simple words ‘consent’ and ‘choice’ then let that be physical, mental, sexual or social.
I am anti the parents who themselves create these gender biases right from the childhood where the daughter is told to help the mother in the kitchen and the son allowed to play. Infact, the concept of bikes for boys and barbies for girls is itself so stereotypical that it boils my blood.
Somebody has rightly said, discrimination against females starts from the womb and ends in her tomb. No wonder we have so many female infanticide cases, dowry deaths, etc. Yes, I agree that we have cases where the females misuse the laws meant for them but mind you the proportion of misuse is much much much lesser than actual cases of abuse. Just to state some facts, only 10% of cases of female abuse get reported and out of that only 1% ends up in conviction. Where do we get justice from then? But you choose to notice only the “fake”cases because that’s much more convenient right?
I would like to tell the people whom I debate with and who call me anti-men and feminist (both of which are often used interchangeably), kindly search the meaning of the word feminist before even blabbering your half knowledge. Feminism means equal rights to every individual irrespective of their sex. Feminism isn’t anti-men. Infact patriarchy is a problem for men too where they are expected to always be strong, earn money, etc even if they wouldn’t wish to do so. I empathize with men who have to bear the burden of this patriarchal set up. But patriarchy has a lot more negative impact on females than males.
In Hindu culture, Manu is considered to be the supreme law giver who had said “Freedom is just for men and it is only gramatically feminine.” Well, Manu himself was a male and who likes to give up their freedom?
I am sure after reading this many people will be like “ladkiyon ko jyada padhate hai toh zuban chalne lagti hai bahut.” But you know what, I really don’t care what you think. I have no shame in standing up for myself and for my sex (Before people freak out, because they love to react based on their half-cooked knowledge, I use the word sex because that is biological; Gender is a socially constructed phenomenon and thus “gender-bias”). I take pride in being educated, informed and outspoken. I have Constitutional rights to equality and freedom and under no circumstances can they be infringed at the hands of the patriarchal society.
I promise to fight for equality till my last breath and if that means breaking relationships with the people who believe in this unjust discriminatiom, so be it. Yes, I am aware I will have numerous failures but the courage to fight and speak is what I believe is success.
A proud feminist constantly defying gender norms.
#genderequality #weallareequal #rights #justice #feminist #feminism #endpatriarchy